Raising tweens and teens is hard.
Parenting can feel downright terrifying when you don't know what’s going on with your tween or teen.
It can feel like a daily struggle, a test of your patience, a repeated feeling of failure. It’s the kind of can’t-eat, can’t-sleep, pervasive worry when you desperately want to do the right thing, but feel confused, overwhelmed, and powerless. It’s that sense of panic — you know the one: the heart-stopping, waking at 3AM fear that your child is up to something, needs something and you don’t know what to do.
I know this because that’s how 99% of parents who come into my therapy practice feel. Parenting at this phase of your son or daughter’s life can be exhausting, demanding, grueling and just straight-up difficult.
As your child grows, so do their problems.
And, what worked when they were younger, won’t work now. In addition, there is a concerning trend that I call middle-of-the-road parenting.
Many parents live in a constant cycle of okay-ness when it comes to tween-to-teens. Things aren't great, and aren't horrible, they’re just “meh, okay.”
The peril of middle-of-the-road parenting is that all too often, you miss the warning that something big is going on.
You wait for a big sign that says,
“Warning. Danger Ahead.”
Consider this your sign. If you have a tween or teen, there IS danger ahead.
Danger can take many forms:
• your tween to teen is no longer talking with you.
• your tween to teen is experiencing anxiety or depression.
• your child has been searching porn sites.
• your daughter just announced she has a boyfriend and they want to take their relationship to the "next level."
• your son’s principal called to say he received detention for pushing another student.
• you just received your teen’s progress report and saw a few F’s.
• your child’s best friend is cutting.
• you heard that a group of kids in your child’s grade just got busted for smoking pot.
Nowadays, it’s no longer a matter of if your child will experience or be exposed to things. It’s a matter of when.
Because of your need, I have created What to Do When™, a unique series to address these concerns and more.
What is What To Do When™?
For almost three decades, I have dedicated myself to the field of family development. As a licensed psychotherapist, gerontologist and addictions counselor, I’ve dedicated myself to offering support in high-risk, high-need situations.
What to Do When™ is your roadmap to navigate the confusing, twisty, turny situations your child will inevitably face during the tween-to-teen years. It’s your companion to address the tough stuff, in the most supportive, open, and loving way, before things spiral out of control.
"Thank you, Julie. I am so grateful for you. You helped me gain a lot of clarity with my family, my marriage, my kids and my life!"
~J.C, mom of 4, ages 9-15
My son was having constant behavior issues at school. It got to the point where he was at the office nearly every week. Since he started with Julie he has not gone to the office not even once! Praise the Lord for having given such potential/talent to Julie! She over-delivers and truly engages with the child and us parents. Thank YOU Julie!
~L.R., mom of two, ages 10 and 14
My son was having difficulty adjusting to the many changes that were happening in his life - middle school, divorce and more. I turned to Julie for help and I am glad I did. I see my son growing and healing in so many ways. He looks forward to his visits with Julie. I would definitely recommend Julie to anyone in need of support.
What to Do When™ pulls from my proven treatment plans that have helped the adolescents and parents I have worked with in my practice. It is filled with my most effective parenting tips, techniques, and advice that pertain to the hot button issues your child is dealing with.
I designed What to Do When™ to be your personal emergency preparedness plan. It's like stocking up on bread and milk (and in my case, gummi bears) and charging the cell phones and laptops before a big storm hits. When you’re prepared, you can ride out the storm.
But… if you wait until the storm hits, it’s too late. You're stuck, caught off guard and scrambling to figure out what to do.
The What to Do When™ Essentials Library prepares you with the insight and tools needed to support your child on topics such as communication, bullying, starting middle school, self-harm, depression + anxiety, vaping, drinking, defiance and more.
Unfortunately, most parents wait until it is too late.
That’s when I step in.
I’m the person parents call when a question turns into crisis, when worry begets panic. I am the person that helps navigate the really tricky, even devastating situations and the effects they have on families.
However, many parents are afraid or aren’t able to make that call. Worries and anxieties grow around what it will cost, will this make a difference, and, frequently, does this mean I’m a “bad” parent.
I want to pause on that last part.
Labels like “good parent” or “bad parent” don’t matter when your child and your family is in crisis. What does matter is that you’re there for your kids.
Being an influence, being their guide, through the really tough, really tricky situations that they’re going to encounter. Because, again, these days, it's not a matter of if your child is going to face these challenges. It’s a matter of when.
What To Do When™ can help.
What To Do When™ is relatable, affordable, and universal. WTDW Essentials start at our incredible introductory price of $39.95 each … that’s a fraction of the cost of a counselor or therapist … or even that daily Chai Latte.
What to Do When™ offers straight talk on the real issues affecting your child. What To Do When™ teaches, guides and supports you and your family as you navigate the adolescent years.
With What To Do When™, you will:
• Understand how and what makes your adolescent tick.
• Learn how to talk and listen so your child opens up.
• Understand how to prevent future issues before they start.
• Redirect and respond by anticipating situations your tween-to-teen will experience.
• Help your adolescent develop skills to be more flexible, solve problems and manage conflict and pressure.
Additionally, What To Do When™, can help you:
• Reduce tension, fighting and power struggles between you and your child.
• Create a robust system of support for you child and yourself.
• Up-level the relationship between you and your tween-to-teen.
• Establish trust and respect between you and your child.
• Stop feeling like you are walking on eggshells around your child.
• Feel centered and confident in yourself.
What to Do When™ supports you in being the parent your child needs during the uncertain adolescent years.
And, what your child needs is understanding, support and an investment … an investment in them and in you.
For those of you who are still procrastinating or feeling that this - whatever this happens to be with your child - isn’t happening in your home, think again.
As the person who has an inside look at these situations, here’s what I absolutely know to be true: most crises could have been prevented or, at least, reduced, if parents knew what to do when the issue first came up.
Bringing a tween-to-teen back from crisis mode costs thousands, tens of thousands, or even hundreds of thousands of dollars. (A private family weekend with me costs upward of $10,000...and that's just one weekend.) It becomes increasingly hard to recover mentally, emotionally, and financially.